I LOVE YOU

I Love You.  Three words that most children learn to utter as soon as they start to speak.  Three words that I utter to my children at least a hundred times a day (each).  Three words that I know I've heard my son say before...


Recently though, every time my husband or I said, "I love you, Isaac" the replies we got were, "Thank you, Daddy" or "Okay, Mommy".  These responses were getting more and more frequent so one day I decided to talk to him about it.  It went something like this:


Me: "Isaac, when someone says, 'I love you,' do you know what you are supposed to say back?"
Isaac: "No."
Me: "Well, if someone says, 'I love you,' and you love them too, then you can say, 'I love you, too'.
Isaac: "Okay."
Me: "I love you, Isaac."
Isaac: "I love you too, Mommy.  That's what you are supposed to say when someone says, I love you."


It made my heart smile.


I love my sweet boy.  I love that I have the privilege of teaching him things that simply come naturally to most kids.  And I really love that he shares his unique perspective of the world with me.


I'm a very blessed mommy of two incredible, unique children.  

My all time favorite picture of Isaac!

Doesn't he make you smile?

"

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Enjoying life...

Yesterday was a good day.  Yesterday, I didn't get a headache.

For as long as I can remember I've suffered from headaches every time I've gotten too hot or exerted myself.  To me it was normal, I've never known anything different.  But this summer I started trying to train for the Susan G. Komen 3-day and I couldn't.  Every day that I tried to train, I had a headache less than a half mile into my walk.  I decided to go to the doctor, where I found out that the headaches I get are Exertion Migraines.  She gave me a migraine medication to try, but it didn't work.  I was pretty disappointed, disheartened, annoyed, mad...

I tried to remain optimistic and kept praying.

A few days later I got an e-mail from my Aunt.  She was letting me know that she'd read an article that suggested taking Feverfew for exertion migraines.  About 20 minutes after I read that e-mail there was an article in my Facebook feed that suggested trying a combination of Feverfew and Ginger Root to prevent migraines.  I was willing and desperate to try anything, so the next day I went to Natural Grocers and spent less than $20 for a 3-month supply of MygraFew (Feverfew formulated specifically for Migraines) and Ginger Root.  I've taken it everyday since and haven't had a migraine.  Now, around the same time that I started taking the herbal remedies the weather cooled down drastically.  So I didn't want to get to excited because I was afraid my lack of migraine may have been because of the cooler weather.  But yesterday I participated in the Dirty Girl 5K (which I was absolutely not in shape for) and didn't get the slightest headache.  It was also about 83 degrees yesterday (definitely hot enough that I would normally have gotten a headache)!  When I finished I was taking pictures, hanging out with friends and family, and enjoying life.  The key phrase there?  I was ENJOYING LIFE!  My head wasn't throbbing, I wasn't nauseated, I didn't feel the need to crawl into my bed, put a pillow over my head and sleep for the rest of the day.  It was an amazing moment and an amazing day.  Some things I'm looking forward to doing soon?  The Manitou Incline, hiking Pike's Peak, and walking 60-miles with my sisters at the Susan G. Komen 3-day!  And lot's, lot's more...those are just my short term plans!!!

Much love to all of you who have been praying for me!

BEFORE...

...& AFTER!  Still smiling!!

lessons from bedtime routine...

Every night before the kids go to bed we  brush teeth, get PJs on, read a story book, read a story out of "the Jesus book" (which is what my kids call the Children's Bible), and then tuck in, pray, and sing songs.  To be honest, there are some nights when I really don't look forward to this time.  There are just some days that the kids seem to bicker, and cry, and disobey...and spend more time in timeout than they spend out of timeout.  If you're a mom...I'm sure you can relate (and if not, I have a suspicion you are lying)!  On these days...the bedtime routine seems more like 20 more minutes that I must endure, than 20 minutes of quality time that I get to spend with my family at the end of the day.  But to be honest, even on those days I come away blessed.  And a few nights ago, the Lord used that time to speak directly to me.

I was having "one of THOSE days", so when Nathan came home from work I escaped the house for a few hours and went to Goodwill and Kohl's.  At Goodwill, I bought the kids some "new" books including a new kid's 365 day devotional book.  (We have after all read the entire "Jesus book" at least 3 or 4 times by now).  That night, I got home from my escape just in time for bedtime routine.  And when it came time for the devotional book I turned to the devotional for July 14 and read the passage to the kids.  After I read it, I summarized it for them, "Kids what this is teaching us is that when our friends move away, or when we move away from our friends we shouldn't let that make us sad all the time.  We should talk to Jesus about it and he will take away our sadness and fill us with his JOY."  

Don't you love the ways God chooses to speak sometimes...that sometimes when we just aren't listening or obeying...and maybe he's having "one of THOSE days, or weeks, or months" with us that he'll come to bedtime routine and take the time to remind us of his love for us and remind us that it is in Him that we find our joy?

GRATEFUL, BLESSED, impatient,emotional

So I suppose I owe an update to my faithful readers.  Oh wait, I talk to the two of you on the phone multiple times a week and you already know everything that happens in my life!  Ahhh, well.  I'll update anyway...per chance someone else stops by this week.  ha-ha

First let me just say, God is way amazing.  I mean it goes without saying...but I'll say it anyway.  After my last blog post, we were completely enveloped with prayer.  Friends, & friends of friends, & friends of friends of friends were posting a link to my blog on their Facebook pages.  Countless numbers of people all over the world were (are) praying for my little boy and my family.  The day after I posted the blog I called my friend and was telling her how engulfed I felt with prayer and love.  I told her, "there must be at least 100 people praying for Isaac...and I just wrote the blog last night!"  Her reply was, "Jeanette, Keith led the entire congregation in prayer for Isaac today..."  Keith is the pastor at Christ Community Church (our church in GA).  I'm honestly not sure how many people regularly attend CCC...but my guess would be about 800.  That is lot's of prayer.  Prayer that I was and still am GRATEFUL for!

For all of you prayer warriors, an update on Isaac:
He's not in excruciating pain like he was when we were traveling.  Which is great!  He is having tiny BMs multiple times every day...so many in fact that we're having to use diaper rash cream on him.  He however, is still trying with all of his might to withhold BMs and his tummy is really, really bloated.  On top of all that, he's a little sick right now.  Mostly just a cough, but is running a slight fever at times too.  He is very prone to upper respiratory infections and pneumonia, so we're praying that he is healed of this illness quickly.  Please keep praying.  Our family is still in a state of limbo from this move (as I'll explain in a moment), so therapies/doctors for Isaac are still on hold for the next few weeks, until we can get settled in.

We are in Colorado now.  We got into the state on April 23 and were able to spend Easter (though we were seriously exhausted) with Nathan's family.  And some family of family...& friends of family....& pets of family...and pets of friends of family...It was quite the welcome!

We don't have a house yet, but we have been offered a beautiful home on-post and will sign for it on June 1.  We've scheduled our household goods to be delivered on June 2 (my Mom is also flying in on the 2nd); and our bedroom furniture to be delivered on June 3.  YAY!  A little background on our being offered this house...we were first offered another house in another neighborhood, which we accepted, but the next day the housing office called back and said they'd mad a mistake and offered us a house that wasn't actually available. So, we were back to no house.  When she called and told me this, God laid it on my heart that it was not a big deal because that house simply was not the house he had for us.  The lady at the housing office promised us we would have the NEXT AVAILABLE HOUSE and told us she was leaving our meeting scheduled for May 3 and they would contact us as soon as they had another offer.  May 3 crept closer and closer and we never heard back from them.  So Nathan and I began calling, leaving voice mails, and sending e-mails...they didn't seem to really even remember us our situation.  But finally someone called us back and informed us that though we in fact would not be able to offer us a home by May 3 they would like to offer us a home in the new neighborhood on June 1.  Let me back-track and say that when we were initially offered a home in Navajo Village I asked how long the wait would be if we wanted to try to get a home in Iroquois Village.  I was told it would be a 1 year+ wait.  But we were in fact a few days later offered a home in Iroquois Village!

 My patience is being tested a little while waiting on the house, but I am beyond grateful and excited.  God has really, really blessed us.  It is precisely 1.6 miles from our driveway to Nathan's work parking lot.  It is across the street from a little neighborhood playground and a bridge that goes to the PX/Commissary.  It is walking distance to a big Post playground and dog park.  It's even the neighborhood and floor plan that I would have chosen if I could have hand picked a home.  It's 10 minutes from Cheyenne Mountain Zoo (which we already have season passes to) and the view in our neighborhood isn't too shabby.  We are so, so BLESSED.  I'm also so, so very IMPATIENT!  Nathan started in-processing today, so he is at Fort Carson, while the kids and I are still in Evergreen.  Don't get me wrong, I am so GRATEFUL (notice a trend in this blog?) that we have a place to stay, and we are really enjoying spending time with Nathan's family.  BUT...we moved out of our old house in early April and we aren't moving into our new house until June.  And Nathan is already at Carson, so I feel a wee bit like he is getting to start our new life without us.  Also...not being in our new neighborhood and not being able to find a new church and make new friends is seriously prolonging my homesickness.  Seriously.  I. AM. A. WRECK.  Sunday at church everyone kept asking me, "Aren't you just SOOOOO HAPPY to be in Colorado?"  They were a bit surprised when I burst into tears and could barely mutter..."Yes, kind of, except I miss my friends, and I miss my church, and I'm just really homesick...but I'm homesick for a place that isn't my home..."  Emotionally unstable.  Apparently that's me right now...

I'm excited though.  Excited about Colorado Springs (mostly).  It is really big, I'm a bit overwhelmed by that. Keep in mind the town I was raised in had a population of 200 in it's most thriving year...so yea.  But I'm really looking forward to living in a "city"!  I'm also really looking forward to finding a church...to making new friends...to having old friends visit (YOU MUST VISIT!!)...and to finding my place to minister and serve.  I know that God has all of this completely planned out.  I know that right now he is telling me to be still and wait.  I'm glad that he knows me inside and out and can completely understand my petty frustration with being still and waiting.  Lord, I don't like it, and I don't want to.  But I will, I will be still and I will wait!  For you know the plans you have for me and they are good!

Nathan drove by our neighborhood today and noticed there was a moving truck parked in front of our house to be!  That means the current residents are moving out (which almost makes it feel sort of like my house instead of theirs).

Oh, also.  Nathan bought me a new camera.  I'm a total amateur, but I'm planning to do some workshops, take some classes, and do some learning.  For now it's a fun hobby...maybe eventually, years and years from now I'll be experienced enough that it can be something more.  So yea, that's all I've got for now.  Please excuse my scattered, jumbled, ramblings.

To those of you actually reading this, I'll probably talk to you on the phone tomorrow.

Pray for Isaac!

Yesterday, we drove from New Albany, MS to Edmond, OK and it was a long day.  My 4 1/2 year old son, Isaac, had a severe tummy ache.  Something that we are all too familiar with.  

In June 2010 my son Isaac was diagnosed with Autism at the age of 3 1/2.  When he was 2 1/2, he began receiving speech therapy through early intervention.  When he started therapy, he didn't have many words.  It was normal for him to grab us by the finger, drag us to whatever it is he needed/wanted and cry with frustration because he didn't have the words to tell us what he wanted.  After beginning speech therapy, his language increased quickly and substantially.  After 2 years of therapy, he no longer needs it.  I cannot express how grateful I am that I can communicate with Isaac.

He has so many amazing skills and he is smart, so smart!  There are however, a few things that he has to work at more than most children.  For example: making eye contact doesn't come naturally for him.  We've been working with him since he was 2, and he has improved so much.  But we do still have to constantly remind him, "Isaac, I need your eyes..." is a sentence that can be heard multiple times a day in our house.  If you ask him, "What is your favorite ________?", he will likely have a hard time answering unless it is a question we've coached him on.  If he gets a new stuffed animal, and you ask him, "What are you going to name it?", he probably won't be able to answer.  Socially, he is somewhat awkward.  He simply doesn't pick up the social cues are completely natural for most of us.  But our biggest battle by far has been potty training.

At 4 1/2, he has recently bladder trained.  Praise the Lord!  Bowel movements on the other hand are a never ending battle.  It is common for autistic children to withhold BMs and potty training is undoubtedly difficult.  But with Isaac it is complicated further because in December 2010 he was diagnosed with something called Hypoganglionosis.  What is that, you ask?  Well, we are supposed to have ganglion cells in our large intestines and those cells are what cause the bowel to contract.  While Isaac does have these cells, he doesn't have as many as he should.  The result...severe, chronic constipation.  Combine that with the fact that he withholds BMs (for weeks at a time) and welcome to our nightmare!  

Surgery is something that we discussed with the Pediatric surgeon when Isaac was diagnosed, but we decided to hold off.  We want to see if he adapts and learns to overcome the handicap of having less cells as he grows.  You have to understand that it's not a decision we made lightly.  The surgery is not exactly simple.  He would probably have to have a colostomy bag for quite awhile, then eventually they would do another surgery to resection his bowel.  We are not opposed to it, but if there is any chance that he can learn to have bowel movements without going through a serious surgical procedure, we would certainly prefer that.  But alas, it is more than a year later now and we have seen no improvement. 

So, yesterday I took this video before we started our road trip...and he continued to be completely distraught and obviously in sever pain for the rest of the day...this is a very small glimpse of what we go through on a daily basis:

My reason for writing this post and posting this video is simple.  I believe in the power of prayer.  Please pray for Isaac.  Pray that he would stop having such problems with his tummy.  Pray for his comfort, that he would not be in pain and that he would not be scared.  Pray for wisdom for Nathan and I as his parents.  We most often feel completely at a loss.  We don't know how to help Isaac, and that is a hard place to find yourself as a parent.  Pray for doctors and therapists that will be involved.  Just PRAY!  And please, pass this on to anyone who would be willing to pray.  

Learning to follow hard

Typically when I feel that the Lord is trying to get my attention or make a change in me, I feel like he is tugging ever so gently at my heart strings...and waiting patiently on me...waiting, waiting, waiting.  

Today though, it was less of a gentle tug and more of a swift kick (figuratively speaking, of course)!  But seriously.  From the time I've gotten up today he has been speaking to my heart with an urgency.  I won't go into every encounter I've had, but I'll share some... 

The sermon on the way to church (on the radio): 

• He spoke to my heart reminding me that he empathizes with me.  Every hurt or pain I've ever or will ever feel, he empathizes.  I'm not ever alone in it...He knows my heart.  He knows my hurts.  He fully understands me.  
• He wants me to follow HIS PLAN.  He wants to bless me fully.  My FEAR and my doubt can get in the way of my receiving God's full blessing.

At church:

• 2 Timothy 1:7  For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (fear), but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.  
• I was reminded that my fear will paralyze me. (By now I'm starting to get that God is dealing with my fear)

During Response time:

• After taking communion, it weighed on my heart that he died for ALL sin.  This is what he said to me, "My child, you live in a world filled with Sin.  You have sinned, you have been hurt by sin.  I died so that one day you can experience an everlasting life free of sin.  But you sit here paralyzed with fear.  Stop being fearful.  Know that I am with you!  Know that I am for you!  Follow Me!  Do you not understand that Satan uses your fear to prevent you from glorifying me.  Do not give into fear!"
• 2 Timothy 4:18 The Lord will rescue me from every evil attack and will bring me safely to his heavenly kingdom.  To him be glory for ever and ever.  Amen.

After Church (brief conversation with a friend/mentor):

• Again, I was reminded how much my fear paralyzes me... (yes, I heard you)  =)

...God has been speaking to me all day.  I am so grateful.  So grateful that he loves me.  That his love is relentless.  

My heart has changed today.  I'm ready to put aside my fear and stop clinging to what is comfortable for me.  I'm ready to follow him despite my fear.  My prayer not just to be bold, but to have the opportunity to be BOLD and bring glory to his name.  I'm done with sitting.  Done with being paralyzed.  I'm ready to get  up and follow my Redeemer.  

Isaiah 41: 10, 13 

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.  

For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.

The scripture he's laid on my heart throughout the past week:

Jeremiah 29:11-14 (The Message)

I know what I’m doing.  I have it all planned out–plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.  When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I’ll listen.  When you come looking for me, you’ll find me.  Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I’ll make sure you won’t be disappointed.  I’ll turn things around for you…You can count on it.

  

Another big move...

It's getting to be that time again...time to PCS.  I think the hardest thing about a move is being able to plan and prepare for the upcoming move, while at the same time being able to be present and enjoy the last few months, weeks, days in the place that you currently call home.  These are precious moments with sweet friends.  More than friends really...people who we do life with, people that we love.

Since Nathan and I have been married this is our 4th "BIG" move.  Technically it's our 6th move, but we won't count moves to a different house in the same town.

OUR 1st MOVE, College Station, TX to Fort Benning/ Columbus, GA:
This one was pretty easy.  Most of our college friends had already moved away from College Station a few months before us.  It was the beginning of Nathan's Army career and we were expecting our first baby.  It was just a really exciting time for us.  This move was unique though because it was temporary.  We already had orders to move to Fort Drum, NY less than a year later, so even as we were starting this new adventure, we were already looking forward to the next one.  I honestly made a conscious attempt to not grow to close to anyone.  Lucky for me, God placed a few forever friends in my path anyway.  I'm so grateful that He intervenes and gives us what we need even if we aren't seeking it (or are possibly even avoiding it).

OUR 2nd MOVE, GA to Fort Drum, NY:
This move wasn't too hard.  One of those forever friends that God blessed me with had already moved to Fort Drum a few months prior to us.  We joke that Isaac and I called Fort Drum home for 25 months, while Nathan and Avonleigh called it home for about 10 months.  We loved Fort Drum.  We loved the unit, the post, and the amazing friends we had there.  But we didn't love the climate or the state.  That combined with the fact that the forever friend that I keep mentioning had already moved back to Fort Benning a few months before us...guess where we were going next?

OUR 3rd MOVE, Fort Drum, NY to Fort Benning, GA (again):
Well technically we moved to AL, but we'll just call it GA.  It's where we spend most of our time...we really just sleep in AL.  This move was easy.  I was planning the move 6 months out and I was so ready to get back to GA.  We have been back here for about 20 months.  To be honest, Fort Benning isn't our favorite post.  But we genuinely love it here.  We love our church, we love our friends, I love working with the youth group...we love, love, love our lives here (with exception of how much we have to drive).  Ha!  But here we are...exactly 9 weeks away from moving day.

MOVE # 4, GA/AL to Fort Carson, CO:
I have never been so incredibly thrilled and excited about a move!  We are moving to Colorado.  It is close to family and lot's of people we love; It is so, so beautiful there; There are four seasons.  Seasonal allergies won't rule our lives.  I could go on and on about things I'm looking forward to.  But though I've never been more excited about a move, I've also never been more heartbroken.  You know that friend I keep mentioning?  Well, she and her husband have 3 kids of their own now.  Our children are BEST friends.  Seriously.  They think they are siblings and they genuinely love each other.  She's my best friend.  Guess what, we're not making this move together...they are moving to Hawaii.  Many of our other friends are moving shortly after us too.  We're dispersing all over the nation.  Yep...this one is going to be hard.  Did I mention that I'm going to miss some teenage girls terribly?

So what now?  I thank God for the time we've had with our friends, for allowing us to be part of a church and community group that we have loved and that has grown our faith.  We start preparing for our upcoming move and prayerfully seeking our new home and our new church.  While at the same time we remain present and cherish the last few weeks that we have here.  We make memories that we will take with us, wherever we go.

Funny kids XD

Avonleigh has been extra funny today...

She started the day off by lifting up her night gown to show me her tummy.  While pointing to her sweet little round toddler tummy she said, "Look Mommy, my tummy is getting big just like yours!"  Grrrr...

She has a little porcelain tea set that I purchased before she was born.  Mind you I purchased it more as decor than a toy, but that is a battle that I have lost.  Avonleigh loves to play tea.  This morning Isaac didn't want to play tea with her, so she just played with Blaire and Lucy instead.  It may not sound that funny, but if you could have seen the looks on the dog's faces as Avonleigh tipped her tiny little tea cup over their noses over and over and over again, saying, "here, have some tea!", then you certainly would have laughed too.

Earlier today I was picking up the floor so I could vacuum, and I picked up Avonleigh's Minnie Mouse that was sitting near the time out area.  When Avonleigh saw me pick up Minnie she ran over and snatched her from me and said, "No Mommy, Minnie is BAD!  She has to stay in time out!"  I also found it amusing that Minnie had been sitting in the same spot for a few hours.  She must have been really bad!

Currently she is outside playing.  Nothing funny about that unless you could see how she dressed herself.  A silky summer nightgown, a sweatshirt jacket, a pink shoe (on the wrong foot), and a brown shoe (also on the wrong foot).

Now, one on Isaac from a few days ago...
It was getting close to bed time so I told him to go clean his room.  He asked me to help him and I told him that I would help him in a few minutes, but asked him to go ahead and start without me.  He trudged into his room, dragging his feet the whole way.  Less than a minute later he was back.  He looked up at me with the most stern face that a 4-year-old can muster and said, "I'm just a kid you know!"  I have no idea where he came up with that!  But it was ridiculously cute.